Top Ten: Motoring Moans
While on our way to pick up pizza the other day, my friend Ade came up with a great idea for this blog, the Top Ten.
The idea is to have a good old fashioned rant about those little things that annoy us every day. It doesn’t have to be ten things, it could be two or five, but ten sounds good.
So to get it all started, here are my Top Five motoring moans.
- Tailgating
I saw a good sticker about this once – “Unless you’re a haemorrhoid, stay off my ass!” - Not Indicating
… particularly on roundabouts. The whole point of roundabouts is to keep the traffic flowing, but it doesn’t work if you don’t know where people are going! That’s when things start to get nasty. - Turning Into Junctions Waaaaaaaaay Too Slowly
You’re behind someone, and they’re doing a reasonable speed, then they decide to turn left (or right, in driving-on-the-right situations) and just as they start to go around the corner they sloooow right down, and you’re trying to keep moving without crashing into them, but you end up coming to a stop because going around this corner seems too difficult for them. - Bad Parking in Car Parks
There’s usually plenty of room for one car, but every so often you see someone who needs 1.15 of a parking space for their titchy Fiat Punto. And you’re left buzzing around the car park, looking for somewhere to go. Grrrr. - Middle Lane Roadhogs
This ridiculous practice (again, only possible in a country where you can’t undertake) turns our already crowded 3-lane motorways into 2 lanes making anyone who doesn’t want to do 62mph move into the slipstream of the outside lane doing 85. Pull over people, we won’t think any less of you for it!!!
What are your main motoring gripes?
March 21st, 2005 at 2:02 pm
Here’s a couple more:
*** Using foglights when it’s not foggy ***
If I wanted to stare into a million watts of light I’d look at the sun or something.
Trying to look like a rally car is pathetic.
*** Hopping amber and red light ***
It’s really easy: Green = go, not green = don’t go.
Just because you can hold you breathe for the time it takes you to sail through the amber/red light and get to the other side, it doesn’t mean you are allowed to do it.
March 21st, 2005 at 2:38 pm
What about the people who can’t cope with the concept of a roundabout, and either sit there paralysed like a bunny caught in the headlights despite it being their right of way, or they just sail on through cutting you up and then honk YOU as you screech to a halt in front of their car.
March 21st, 2005 at 2:54 pm
There you go – there’s another one! Getting cut up. You can almost see it coming, but because you’re in a cornering situation it can be a bit tricky to toot the horn, give the one-fingered salute and not crash all at the same time.
March 21st, 2005 at 5:01 pm
Smoking in the car.
March 21st, 2005 at 5:31 pm
Crazy Horse – you really know how to hold a grudge, don’t you!!
That reminds me, perhaps I should mention falling asleep at the wheel, in the outside line doing about 70mph, with a smoking passenger on board.
“<snorrrrrrrre , snort, cough> Eh? What’s that rumbling sound?”
“That would be the rumbly white line between us and the crash barrier, Deri.”
March 21st, 2005 at 11:40 pm
I would call it fond memory rather than a grudge.
It was while reading your top motoring moan that it came to me.
March 22nd, 2005 at 9:44 am
Son of “Bad Parking in Car Parks”
Why is it that every time you park in a completely empty car park, your car is mysteriously transformed into a magnet, and on your return you invariably find that the other two cars in the car park are parked each side of yours?
It is then impossible to open the driver or passenger door and you are forced to enter your vehicle via the tailgate.
March 22nd, 2005 at 11:50 am
“Shouldn’t have such a nice car, then, should you!” says fellow A3 owner.
March 23rd, 2005 at 1:05 pm
How about the for 17yr old, burberry cap wearing Corsa 1.2 drivers who insist on waiting until they approach a sharp bend on the brow of a hill before overtaking
March 23rd, 2005 at 8:44 pm
Today on the motorway I thought of another. Racing lorries!
You know the sort of thing – the motorway squeezes down to only two lanes and one truck decides to overtake the other truck. However, being limited to 60mph the truck on the inside lanes slows down to 58mph and the truck on the outside lane is doing 60mph. Four miles later and with huge tailbacks the other truck finally pulls over and you can breathe again.
I don’t know why they do it, it won’t get them anywhere any faster, particularly as they can only do 60mph in the end. In fact, by slowing down to let each other overtake they’re actually going slower overall. They probably do it because a) they’re bored or b) they can, and enjoy seeing red faced motorists scream past when they finally unblock the road.
Tsk.
March 23rd, 2005 at 10:10 pm
Boz – just use your real name, it’s OK.